THE day

I woke up before the sun even came over the mountains.  The entire house was still quiet, which usually means go back to sleep.  But not this morning.  Butterflies were circling my stomach and I knew there was zero chance I would return to sleep, so might as well get up and start this day.  This was THE day.  One of those days you think about since your baby was born.  The day we had been anticipating the entire summer.  My boy was starting kindergarten.  I had been up 10 minutes when Chase came barreling into our room, fully dressed, with a nervous smile matching my own.  He told me he was excited, but nervous, and was going to be brave.

After packing a lunch (....do I really have to do that everyday?), getting the girls dressed, having Dad go on a donut run (nothing like a healthy start for your first day of school), we were out the door at 7:45 (...wait, do I have to do that every single day?)

And supposedly 45 minutes too late as the entire neighborhood was jam packed.  Chase was announcing every passing minute on the clock.  I was stressing even more.  We parked semi-legally and hauled it into the kindergarten area, which was packed to the rim with every mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, aunt, uncle...so it seemed .  I kind of pushed Chase into his classroom, then rammed myself in to take a couple of pictures.  He had the most worrisome little face that was just breaking my heart.  I waved, put on a smile, and choked back a bunch of tears.  And then left.

Driving away I was thinking, did I really just leave him in a strange place, entrusted to the care of someone I briefly met the day before, for five hours?   I had nervous knots in my stomach the entire day.  Were the kids going to be nice to him?  Who would he sit by at lunch? Who would he play with on the playground? Was he going to find his confidence? Would he speak up in class? Would he feel comfortable asking his teacher a question?  I counted down the minutes til I could leave to pick him up. 

The time finally came.  We arrived 20 minutes early to ensure a parking spot.  I was not gonna be late on his first day.  I wasn't the only kindergarten Mom anxiously waiting at the gate with plenty of time to spare.  I finally saw him lined up outside the gate and breathed a sigh of relief as his eyes met mine with a big smile.

We celebrated our milestone with ice cream where I tried to extract every detail possible about his day.  Of the few details I gathered were that during lunch they played chase the girls and put them in jail.  He met one girl in his class that asked him to be her friend.  They were supposed to draw a picture of what they did over the summer in their journals, so he drew California, Nevada and Utah with our house and Kelly's house and where we drove. 

I told him Mia and I really missed him while he was gone.  He replied, "I didn't miss you at all."  I guess that is a success....even if a stab in the heart.

Now I have to do this all over again tomorrow?